December 20th, 2006

Coffee Squirrel

I need help...

I tried. I read about it in my Nutrition class. I learned that it can be caused by a lack of something, then the brain just never turns back to normal even after that nutrient is received. I've been doing it since I was a kid and am shocked that it hasn't hardened my arteries and caused my death by now. There were a couple of years I don't remember doing it. This year has been out of control, though. I tried. I tried for a couple of days not to eat raw baking soda. I couldn't do it. I eat about a teaspoon a day; I eat it a quarter tea spoon at a time, touching my tongue to it and chewing its grainy goodness bit by bit.

I cannot think of any good reason why I crave the stuff. I'm pretty sure I have PICA or a PICA-related disorder. Everything I've found, though, mentions dirt and clay and starch (particularly for pregnant women, starch can be a craving -- no pregnancy here. Trust me.). None of the sites mention baking soda. But the compulsion to eat it and the satisfaction I get when I DO eat it are...powerful.

I wonder if some kind of hypnosis would help. I've heard it's useful for some. I know. I'm a freak. Now that you know, I hope you don't hate me...
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